I have come to a point where I finally realized and accepted the fact that I am bi, I am attracted to both guys and girls. I am 17 and I have been in denial for a long time, strugguling with my sexuality, hating myself for having sexual desires over guys, even crying and writing suicidal notes to myself. My parents hate gay people (they are christians) and talk so badly about that, which makes me feel so miserable. I was so confused, thinking that it was wrong to be gay and that God would not receive me. Now i came to the conclusion that it was God's will for me to be the way I am and thatany form of love is totally acceptable. But it's so hard for me, I feel like there are so many people against it (at least in my family) and i don't see myself coming out. Why is society so mean to gay people? I mean it's hard enough without their hate. I suppose I am still a bit confused ; I already accepeted myself, but what about everyone else?
I would really appreciate some advice,
Thank you
Update:I would also like to talk to someone that could help me, or a website or organization.
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
I understand what you're going through, and there IS a lot of horrible homophobia in the world, especially the Christian world. I'm glad you've finally accepted yourself and you're not seeing it as such a horrible thing anymore; there are too many people who seem to think that it's some kind of choice, and that's part of what breeds the hate. The best advice I can give you is to stay strong in your values and don't let anything run you down. If you're worried about your parents, you don't have to tell them right away, but maybe try to educate them subliminally. If you want to talk, feel free to IM me, (my sn is Dragon6xx) I'd be happy to be your outlet for a while.
The conclusion you came to is a healthy one. You are a part of God's creation and as such, you are made perfect in His image. You need not judge yourself for who you are. You know who you are and how you are made - so does God. Your parents love you too, but have an incomplete understanding of the diversity of God's creation.
Your instinct to wait on coming out should guide you at this point - just my opinion. Coming out is usually a gradual process. You've started the process with your self acceptance. It takes time, however, to let go of internalized homophobia. It also will take time for you to be ready to share those parts of yourself that others may be judgmental about.
There are some good books out there on being gay (or bi) and being Christian. Contrary to popular belief, the two are not mutually exclusive.
It's tough to go through this part of your life. I hope you have someone or even a group of friends who can listen to you, not judge you, and love you just the way you are.
Remember that this is a process . . . so be good to yourself as the process unfolds.
dude just be tour self if they love you they would take you for yourself im a bi and im around your age i am 15
These are good websites for bi youth:
http://www.outproud.org/
http://www.oasismag.com/
Fortunately you'd be able to leave your parents relatively soon, that would be horid!