My husband wants to take me to eat for my birthday and leave our 6 month old with our friend and I'm having trouble with it. I'm going to feel so guilty and miss him. What should I do?
Almost every mother goes through it. I say almost because there are those not so motherly type.
Any way it is important for you and you husband to have time to yourselves. Maybe he just wants some of your undivided attention like he use to get before baby.
As long as you trust your friend it will be ok.
Take a cell phone and you can check up on them once or twice.
Just remember your friend can't give the baby the attention it needs if she's constantly on the phone reassuring you.
If your still having trouble with leaving your little one, maybe hubby can get a nice take out dinner and have it at home.
Here's an unusual, but easy and guilt free solution.
A bit of background: When my youngest was 6 months old, my hubby and I attended my high school reunion. It was about 30 minutes from our house. I did not want to feel like I had to get back in a set period of time. My baby was exclusively nursing at that time, and didn't take bottles (as a stay-at-home mom, I saw no reason to introduce them).
My mom went with us to the reunion. She had an RV, and took some toys and games for my older child, and the 3 of them had a "sleepover" in the parking lot while my hubby and I went to the reunion. I did need to step out once to nurse my daughter. She fell asleep while nursing, so I put her in a sling and went back to the party while wearing a sleeping baby, which was no problem.
If you really do not want to leave your baby, why not have your friend accompany you, or go to a restaurant right by your friend's house. In my area, there are several open-air malls with restaurants. Your friend could take the baby around the outside area and window shop while you had dinner. That way, you would not feel rushed.
I never had sitters for my children before at least age 3 (other than my mom, for very short periods of time). Still, I see no problem with you going out to a birthday dinner. You may enjoy it more if your friend is outside the restaurant with the baby walking around, though. Then you will not feel rushed.
GO!!! Trust me, you will beg for those quiet moments someday. Your baby will be fine. I know it can be hard, but a few hours won't hurt. We all need a break sometimes, and being a mom is no different. Don't feel guilty about it, because in the end you will go back to your baby a little more refreshed and relaxed, and that is always good when you are parenting a baby. :-)
initiate off with leaving the toddler for one hour at your place for one hour and then come decrease back. whether you in simple terms force around the corner stay long previous for an hour. Then next time 2 hours. Be very particular and sparkling on your regulations, schedules, feeding for the toddler and tell your sitters to call you every time they have a question. I even have 5 babies and leaving them continues to be perplexing yet you like it greater desirable than you think of. you're nonetheless a spouse first and optimal. depart toddler w/somebody you have confidence and enjoy your husband's company and your anniversary.
My daughter was 2 months and left her with my mother in law to go out with my husband on our year anniversary. It was hard and i kept thinking about her all night but it was nice to get out and have a nice adult dinner. When you do it once it just gets easier to relax... if your friend is reliable and responsible then have a great time out... it is only for a few hours.
To me if you feel that way you don't really trust that friend that much. If you don't trust your friend enough to leave your baby with her you should find someone else that you think is more responsible like a family member or something. If you don't trust her it's not worth it if she isn't responsible enough. But if you trust her it's okay relax and have a great time.
As long as you leave the baby with someone you trust whats a few hours. Its not like your going to leave for a day right? Take a break and breath...:) You and your hubbie deserve it.
Go out with your husband and enjoy it! Maintaining a strong marriage is one of the greatest gifts you can give your son. It's important for you and your husband to have time alone.
You can also feel less guilty if you realize that you're beginning to teach your son that even though Mom and Dad go away, they always come back.
I had the same thing with my first child. He really was fussy and I hated to leave him ever. The one date we did go on I remember was our anniversary and I HATED every minute of it. I couldn't wait to get home. SO I would say don't do it if you are not ready to.
I love to go out now, you are the mother though so do what feels right to you!
It's ok...your baby will be ok...I felt the same way...my son was born 8 days after my 4yr wedding anniversay and my daughter was born on June 26th and my 6yr anniversary was July 1st...and I left my almost 2yr old and new baby with my mil...it was nice to have a break but I couldn't wait for dinner to be done with to rush home to my babies!
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Verified answer
It's called seperation anxiety.
Almost every mother goes through it. I say almost because there are those not so motherly type.
Any way it is important for you and you husband to have time to yourselves. Maybe he just wants some of your undivided attention like he use to get before baby.
As long as you trust your friend it will be ok.
Take a cell phone and you can check up on them once or twice.
Just remember your friend can't give the baby the attention it needs if she's constantly on the phone reassuring you.
If your still having trouble with leaving your little one, maybe hubby can get a nice take out dinner and have it at home.
Happy Birthday!
Here's an unusual, but easy and guilt free solution.
A bit of background: When my youngest was 6 months old, my hubby and I attended my high school reunion. It was about 30 minutes from our house. I did not want to feel like I had to get back in a set period of time. My baby was exclusively nursing at that time, and didn't take bottles (as a stay-at-home mom, I saw no reason to introduce them).
My mom went with us to the reunion. She had an RV, and took some toys and games for my older child, and the 3 of them had a "sleepover" in the parking lot while my hubby and I went to the reunion. I did need to step out once to nurse my daughter. She fell asleep while nursing, so I put her in a sling and went back to the party while wearing a sleeping baby, which was no problem.
If you really do not want to leave your baby, why not have your friend accompany you, or go to a restaurant right by your friend's house. In my area, there are several open-air malls with restaurants. Your friend could take the baby around the outside area and window shop while you had dinner. That way, you would not feel rushed.
I never had sitters for my children before at least age 3 (other than my mom, for very short periods of time). Still, I see no problem with you going out to a birthday dinner. You may enjoy it more if your friend is outside the restaurant with the baby walking around, though. Then you will not feel rushed.
GO!!! Trust me, you will beg for those quiet moments someday. Your baby will be fine. I know it can be hard, but a few hours won't hurt. We all need a break sometimes, and being a mom is no different. Don't feel guilty about it, because in the end you will go back to your baby a little more refreshed and relaxed, and that is always good when you are parenting a baby. :-)
initiate off with leaving the toddler for one hour at your place for one hour and then come decrease back. whether you in simple terms force around the corner stay long previous for an hour. Then next time 2 hours. Be very particular and sparkling on your regulations, schedules, feeding for the toddler and tell your sitters to call you every time they have a question. I even have 5 babies and leaving them continues to be perplexing yet you like it greater desirable than you think of. you're nonetheless a spouse first and optimal. depart toddler w/somebody you have confidence and enjoy your husband's company and your anniversary.
My daughter was 2 months and left her with my mother in law to go out with my husband on our year anniversary. It was hard and i kept thinking about her all night but it was nice to get out and have a nice adult dinner. When you do it once it just gets easier to relax... if your friend is reliable and responsible then have a great time out... it is only for a few hours.
To me if you feel that way you don't really trust that friend that much. If you don't trust your friend enough to leave your baby with her you should find someone else that you think is more responsible like a family member or something. If you don't trust her it's not worth it if she isn't responsible enough. But if you trust her it's okay relax and have a great time.
As long as you leave the baby with someone you trust whats a few hours. Its not like your going to leave for a day right? Take a break and breath...:) You and your hubbie deserve it.
Go out with your husband and enjoy it! Maintaining a strong marriage is one of the greatest gifts you can give your son. It's important for you and your husband to have time alone.
You can also feel less guilty if you realize that you're beginning to teach your son that even though Mom and Dad go away, they always come back.
I had the same thing with my first child. He really was fussy and I hated to leave him ever. The one date we did go on I remember was our anniversary and I HATED every minute of it. I couldn't wait to get home. SO I would say don't do it if you are not ready to.
I love to go out now, you are the mother though so do what feels right to you!
It's ok...your baby will be ok...I felt the same way...my son was born 8 days after my 4yr wedding anniversay and my daughter was born on June 26th and my 6yr anniversary was July 1st...and I left my almost 2yr old and new baby with my mil...it was nice to have a break but I couldn't wait for dinner to be done with to rush home to my babies!